Dustin Eyejuice – Dustcast

In this series of segments, local man (thick Plymouthian accent, aged about 29.. not a janner as such) Dustin Eyejuice offers helpful advice to listeners as well as complaints about the show. Each segment should be recorded in the style of a message he left on an answering machine.
In this fifth segment, Dustin calls with an plea to the landlord of Hammer’s as well as an update on his ongoing mission to get a local butcher’s shop closed down after they sold him a bad pasty. He also thinks Plymcast would benefit from having more of him and less music and other things. He also suggests a name change, to Dustcast.

[FX: Beep]
DUSTIN
A couple of things I need to get off my chest – firstly, the show seems to be getting a little better, but only due to all the fan mail I’m getting. I think you guys would do well to cut your losses, get rid of all the music and other stuff and rename the show to ‘Dustcast’ and just let me be. Speaking of which, I have this message for the landlord of Hammer’s on Sebastian Avenue – Terry, I had no idea the boy was your nephew and I certainly had no idea the cat was a rare breed or worth several thousands of pounds. I would have thought that the repeated mentions on my award winning segments on this show alone were driving ample new business your way, but if you must persist with this foolish vendetta, then you should know that Chris from Bishop Butchers on Clyde Road has been selling bad pasties to your patrons and been slipping a bit of extra meat to your daughter, Rosie, if you get me. It’s time to let bygones by bygones. Bye.

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